Australia and the World Past and Present

We are hearing more and more about mental load these days.

Do you find that you have more and more things in your life that you need to deal with and manage?

It takes quite a lot of mental energy to keep track of all the different tasks that you have to do in your life. This is mental load

This can rise to a new level when one starts to have children.

All these tasks take up our mental bandwidth.

There are meals to prepare and grocery shopping to do.

Bills are constantly arriving and need to be paid.

Whose birthday is coming up?

There are childcare issues and later school issues.

The are extra-curricula activities to sign up for and attend. Sporting activities are common. There will be fees, perhaps a uniform, weeknight training and weekend games.

If you are lucky, you will be adept at planning and can sail through ok. But many will find it overwhelming trying to keep track of everything in their head.

One of the main narratives for mental load is that it is a women’s issue. In Australia, the issue disproportionately affects women because they are often doing the lion’s share of mental planning for day-to-day activities. But this is not the whole story. Men can be and often are affected by mental load. If the father is a sole parent and primary care giver this almost goes without saying.

But it can affect all men to some degree.

Within a family the division of labour will be crucial. It is up to each family to decide what each family member will do. Often this division reflects the interests or aptitudes of each person.

Some people are better at or happier doing the finances. Some like cooking. Some like mowing the lawn. Some like gardening. And yes, some people even like cleaning.

The more things one has to do, the greater the need for scheduling.

Some individuals may even break out a spreadsheet. If that is something that you are inclined to do, go for it. Whatever works for you. As long as you are able to keep track of things and not feel swamped.

The more complicate things get, the more delegation will be necessary.

Many people struggle with delegation. They may want to be able to do everything themselves.

Delegation to the kids is possible at a certain age and may even be preferable.

Chores give children a sense of responsibility. They teach kids that they a part of a wider team and that they can contribute in their own way.

Kid’s tasks will usually be relatively straightforward but can increase with complexity as they get older. Children may start off tidying their room, or taking the rubbish out, or taking the dog for a walk.

Getting them to start preparing meals isn’t just about eating for the day. With the right amount of information and support they will learn many of the skills they will need for later life.

Delegation outside of the family may be an option too. Many Australians balk at the idea of having hired help. As a nation that prides itself on egalitarianism, some people don’t feel fully comfortable with someone outside the family unit washing the dishes or doing the washing.

Some cultures around the world wouldn’t have it any way. It may cut against the grain for many in Australia, but it may be advisable in many cases. You can’t do everything. There are limited number of hours in the day. Some people delegate these type of things and prioritise their time for other things.

Tasks require a certain amount of physical energy, but they also take mental energy.

Multitasking is not the easiest thing in the world. You may feel that you are like a juggler in a circus. Watch out or you may face burnout.

There are some things that men tend to worry about (but not all men). Family finances is one. Stress from constantly thinking about this can snowball and become overwhelming.

The world is a complicate place and so many people are time-poor these days. It may be useful to monitor your mental load and understand the signs if things are becoming too much. Planning is key as is communication and delegation. And yes, mental load can affect men as well as women.